21st Century Dad
One Dad's Thoughts, Ideas, and Feelings.
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A New Father and a New Man

March 6th, 2008 . by 21st Century Dad

Every expectant father is told that it’s a profound, life-changing experience. I thought, “well, duh! Isn’t it obvious?” No matter how much you know and how forthcoming all your male friends are, there are still surprises. You can read The Expectant Father, scour the internet, and talk to every man you know with a child. Fatherhood is definitely one of those things you learn on the job.

Everyone knows you change. Some of those changes happen right away, as if switch was flipped. Other changes take longer.

Some changes happen immediately. This is the revolution.

  • You pay closer attention while driving. South Florida drivers are among the worst in the US!
  • Your routine is shattered. Everything you’re used to doing is suddenly different.
  • You feel this incredible rush of unconditional love for your child.

Other changes come gradually. This is evolution.

  • I’m becoming much more interested in health and wellness.
  • Making healthier choices when eating is much more important.
  • I’ve lost interest in caffeine, nicotine, and alcohol.
  • Anything risky (financial, personal, physical) is evaluated more carefully before engaging in it.
  • I’ve always had a passing interest in ecologically sound practices. That level of interest has increased.

There is an overall shift in your thinking, your attitude toward life, toward people, and toward the world. There are some choices that I never thought I would make:

  • We followed our friend Caroline’s advice to use a midwife. I always imagined a hospital birth. I’m so glad we chose natural childbirth instead. If you are expecting, I urge you to consider using a midwife.
  • Renee and I weren’t even aware of infant potty training until she stumbled across the concept after Twilli was born. Now we are semi-successful practitioners. We’re using about half as many diapers now.
  • Renee remembers when her brother was in cloth diapers. Those memories aren’t pleasant. Now that we are doing infant potty training (or elimination communication), it’s apparent why cloth diapers and IPT/EC go hand-in-hand.

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